Thane's Promise
by BadOrange
Summary: One-shot with the prompt 'promise' Shepard struggles with her feelings and Thane is the only one to make her feel better.


Thane's Promise

Bioware owns all

Shepard rocked on the balls of her heels, fingers tugging at her tank top. Dammit she was nervous, she had been avoiding Thane since they had destroyed the collectors. She couldn't eat, she couldn't sleep, and God only knew how ridiculously tired she was. The nightmares had returned, a few hours of sleep was all she managed and in her daze she had stumbled into the elevator and was now debating whether or not to disturb him. She pressed her fingers against the metal door and sighed, would he really want to see her? Would he still be remotely interested? The night they had flown before their supposed deaths had been...so wonderful, an emotional intimacy. Butterflies erupted in Shepard's belly and she cursed herself for such feelings.

But she had to go and ruin things, things like love were difficult, that sudden epiphany had struck her hard half way through the suicide mission. _Talk about distractions_. She knew Thane was going to die and it only made her dilemma ten times more difficult. God the galaxy really shat on her. The most incredible person she was ever to meet would soon die. The thought almost killed her.

She dug deep inside her jeans pockets and pulled out a packet of cigarettes, she immediately put one in her mouth and lit it. She took a satisfying drag, hollowing her cheeks and enjoying how the smoke filled her lungs. If she kept this habit up she would soon follow in Thane's footsteps. Not that it would be a bad thing, the galaxy would be a very lonely place without him. Fuck, she didn't know what to do.

After the cigarette had burned to the filter she dropped it to the floor, stabbing it with her boot and conjured up enough courage to open the door. Darkness greeted her and she suddenly felt so out of place. She didn't want to disturb him, not when he needed sleep. She didn't understand herself why she was here, comfort? Attention? Maybe she was just lonely. None of it seemed to make sense; she had avoided him, probably made it clear she didn't want to have anything to do with him. But she did, she really fucking did.

"Siha?" His voice found her in the darkness and the sound of him stirred up something that had previously lain dormant. She wanted him, now, on this ship, for as long as he would have her, "Is something wrong?"

She thought about reaching for another cigarette, wanting to ease the shaking of her hands. She needed to feel the buzz of nicotine to get her through the moment. She was scared shitless. Scared of what he thought. Scared of the mass of unknown that was screwing with her head. She didn't want a dying man; she wanted someone to live, to be with her. She wanted Thane to live.

Shepard felt the silence distressing; she needed to hear him to know that he was still here, fucking breathing. She needed to hear him breathing.

"I couldn't sleep," She tried to keep her voice steady, and she quickly rounded the corner and found him getting out of bed, a pair of cotton pants adorning his hips, his chest bare. She had disturbed him and inwardly cursed herself for being so stupid. Her response seemed amateur, it was no excuse to perturb one of her crew, but she needed to know that she wasn't alone.

"Is that all?" It wasn't a question filled with annoyance, it was almost as if Thane had sensed that it wasn't the only thing that was wrong here. Once again he was right, so fucking right. Shepard felt her throat tighten and she crawled onto the cot beside him, craving his warmth and his understanding.

Thane automatically brought his arm around her and she buried her face into his neck. His fragrance filled her, a faint hint of the leather he had been wearing and something so familiar; a smell she could never place. Shepard quickly felt herself losing control, throat tightening further; she had so many questions and no clue where to even begin.

"What is it Siha?" His cool hands brushed her face and she nuzzled herself further into his neck, blackness meeting her eyes. She wrapped her hands around his waist and ran fingers over coarse flesh, imagining trailing them over black stripes. Shepard had sensed his concern and she fucking wished she didn't have to trouble him with her problems; she was emotional wreck and didn't have time to let all that come pouring out. But she was losing it, really truly losing it since Horizon. She had no idea how to fix it, no solutions, she just couldn't stop thinking. About Thane, about their future, about his disease about how he wasn't going to live and how she didn't want to live either, "Please tell me." His voice was pleading and it crushed her.

Shepard held back a sob and grazed kisses across his shoulder, she couldn't look at him. Those large obsidian eyes would be her undoing; she wouldn't be able to possess any sanity left if she let it all out.

"I just-," She started, scrunching up her eyes. He must have felt it, he reached for her hand and intertwined their fingers, hers stretching to accommodate his fused ones. He kissed the top of her head and his other hand stroked tendrils of her dark hair. The hair that he found so fascinating and yet it was so simple to her. After he was gone, nothing like this would ever happen again and it really fucking scared her.

"I don't want to lose you," Her voice faltered and tears blistered her eyes, threatening to fall. She was going to cry and he was going to think she was stupid, so fucking stupid, "After we dock at Omega you might want to leave and I'd never see you again and I'll feel so lost without you, I can't lose you," The tears began to flow and she kept her face hidden, she didn't want to show him how weak she was. The hero Shepard was really a disaster, a woman who loved a man with a limited amount of time. She wanted to make the best of it but she was so scared for the future, "Thane I can't lose you."

Shepard gripped him and her body shuddered as a sob raked through her. She gasped for breath and tried to keep her breathing steady but she was already too far gone. Her body shook with every devastating cry, sounds she had never heard left her lips and she felt disgusted at how awful she felt. Thane continued to run his fingers through her hair in methodical patterns and when her crying stopped he sought out her lips and chastely kissed her. He kissed away the tears freely flowing down her cheeks, the saltiness unusual to his tastebuds. He kissed every part of her until she had calmed down enough to kiss him back.

Her lips were puffy and rough against his; he tasted of spice, of cinnamon, of everything exotic. She breathed him in and he smelt divine, familiar, comforting, of home. She wrapped arms around his neck and brushed her tongue along his; wanting everything he was willing to give. He kissed her back with the same urgency, fingers caressing the skin underneath her top, so incredibly soft.

Thane pulled her on top of him, angling himself underneath her so that he could bury himself in her neck, kissing her and running his tongue across her clavicle, she moaned and took hold of his shoulders, fingers grazing over the red ridges on his neck. She met lips with him again and his breath was fierce against her cheeks. Shepard could feel his chest rising and falling in time with hers; she could hear his haggard breath matching her own. She could feel the raging of his heart underneath his scaled skin, pounding with hers. He was alive, and she was alive and she wanted him to make her feel better, to help her figure her shit out. She wanted to make sure she did the same; she wanted to make sure he had a reason to live.

"Siha I promise," He broke apart for a brief moment his breathing harsh, his hands stopping in their movements, she ground against his hips biting back a moan. Shepard let the hallucinations take her, her eyes adjusting to the darkness. He rose like a fire in her eyes and she mewled at how ridiculously hot he made her feel, one fucking look and she was melting away in front of him. The sweat on the back of her neck felt like water torture, each droplet running down her skin making her mouth ache for moisture. He kissed the sides of her lips, pulling her further into him, their chests touching.

Thane moved her against him, creating enough friction to elicit a groan. He needed it just as much as she did. Skin felt like oceans underneath her exploratory fingers, she wanted to touch all of him, to feel, to listen to him groan as her hands grazed over erogenous places. She wanted all of it and more.

He slipped his hands underneath her top and lifted the hem, pulling it up over her breasts desperate for her to take it off. Shepard gladly obliged and the cloth slipped from her with such ease. She felt like she was floating, the air carrying her and she felt so fucking great that she might die. His mouth against her hardened nipple sent a shock of electricity through her and her stomach tightened with want. She was so fucking turned on and if Thane didn't stop teasing her she really would die.

"Thane, I..." Her voice broke off into a moan, his fingers gliding over her abdomen pulling at the buttons of her jeans. His tongue made circles over her and she panted, her lungs never getting enough air. She felt light-headed like she would black out. It felt unbearable, his kisses scorching her skin, she was hyper-sensitive and his breathing was echoing in her mind. She swore she could have heard a fucking pin drop anywhere on the ship at that moment, she was so attune with the galaxy that they were almost one. Shepard felt herself slipping into madness and Thane was the only to help her out.

"Siha," His voice rumbled in his chest and she saw him struggling with her pants in the haze. She shuffled off his lap and with a shoulder to lean on she shimmied them off and tossed them across the room. Shepard heard an almost inaudible noise erupting from him and the sound made her weak at the knees. She was addicted, addicted to him, his toxin, to his taste, to his life. They both needed to be alive, right now, on the uncomfortable cot, with no separation of cloth. She needed skin on skin, to feel his warmth, to feel him inside her, she needed all of it, always.

Thane pinned her beneath him, he ground his hips into her, the movement so vigorous Shepard whimpered. She needed more, so much more. His hands worked themselves across her body, heat radiating from her like a supernova. If he didn't hurry up she was going to fucking explode and only he would be left accountable. She tugged at the cotton pants barely clinging to his hips, she manage to tug them down his muscular thighs, exploring as she went. He felt so incredible, she only wished to see the way black lines zigzagged down his chartreuse torso and the ribbing that matched his neck.

He moved away and took off his trousers in record speed, he climbed on top of her, pinning her again. His chest collided with her hardened nipples and she hissed, the feeling so overwhelming her toes curled in response. He sheathed himself inside her, the feel of him had whimpers escaping her, every inch of him was fucking bliss and she was going to die because she felt too good. The toxin had finally waned and she could barely make him out in the darkness. She wanted to see him so she could see how she made him feel. She wanted him to remember her face, every inch of her to be perfect memory. She only wished she could do that too, long after he would be gone she would have moments like these to prevent the loneliness of cold nights.

The thought raked a sob from her and Thane halted the rhythm, his thrusts slowed and his fingers brushed against her face. Involuntary tears caressed her cheeks and she blushed, suddenly thankful that the darkness was impenetrable. His girlfriend crying whilst be fucked, a real boost for the confidence. But she couldn't help it, he made her feel so good and she could feel the butterflies in her stomach as he filled her again. Shepard couldn't stop, she groaned with every thrust, matching her hips to his. She was on the edge, stars dancing in front of eyes. The room was spinning and she gripped onto Thane for support, he thrust again and her mind split apart. Growls met groans and the moans that shrieked from her, shocked her. She had to be dying, she couldn't breathe, he clung to her and she tried to breathe but each movement had her melting, the feeling wouldn't stop. Her toes curled and she arched into him, she could feel him tensing and it was enough to feel herself peaking again.

Shepard goaded him and his lips crushed hers, each kiss separated with a pant for air. He was so close, and she squeezed him and he moaned so spectacularly that he had Shepard falling apart at the seams. Her release forced his own and every last thrust was met with a mewl, a guttural groan. His hands moving roughly against her skin, her name on her lips as he reached completion.

The Commander's heart was racing, pulsing in her ears and it was the only thing she could hear. Thane's lips were moving but it was inaudible, he kissed her with such gentleness and passion she was scared she would break apart again. She wondered if she would ever come down, her breath never slowing. She didn't want it to end, she felt so high, so fucking happy she could cry all over again.

Thane moved next to her and she rolled over to rest her head against his chest. He wrapped an arm around her and stroked her fingers through her damp hair. A memory to always cherish. He waited until breathing had returned to normal before he made any sort of movement, he tilted her chin up so he could look at her. Cheeks tinted red, blue eyes glossed over like she still wanted to cry. His heart ached, he wanted to do anything to make sure his Siha would never cry, never cry for him.

Shepard could hear his calming heart beat and it was soothing, he was still alive, still kicking, still with her and it made her heart swell. She never wanted this to end, ever, she would do everything in her power to save his life. When she met his eyes, black pools looked back and she noticed how vulnerable he looked and she moved to rest her forehead against his, fingers caressing his cheeks. His voice was a whisper, reverberating though his chest;

"I promise I will always be with you Siha."


End file.
